When my daughter was six, she threw a tantrum in the middle of a supermarket. I knew I had to bring my “Communication A-Game.” 😉
I don’t know where she picked it up, probably from some friends at the playground, because this was not typical behavior for Leyla Coenen.
When she didn’t get her way, she threw a tantrum.
Stomping her feet, yelling, dropping to the floor—there was just nothing you could do with her.
It was like she was possessed by the devil.
My wife and I were stunned. This had never happened before.
Something needed to be done.
Once she was quiet, I sat her down and told her:
“This is not the way we treat each other.
If you want something, let me know.
I will tell you once: Yes or No.
– If I tell you No, it’s No. I will not change my mind.
You don’t have to ask mom; it’s No. ‘No’ overrules any ‘Yes.’
– If I say Yes, it will happen, 100%. You can count on me.
You don’t have to remind me; I will make it happen.”
After that, she never threw a tantrum. Life’s been good.
The thing I learned that day, which has served us through the last 12 years together, is that in communication, clarity is everything.
Say what you do, do what you say.
Boundaries are sacred.
PS: Enjoy this?
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